part 4

My Mother is almost breaking down. She just got the call from Marcus, my older brother, saying that he hasn't seen me in a week. None of my relatives have. The phone is still off its cradle from when Ma dropped it 15 minutes ago. Dad isn't home yet. He's still working at his pawn shop. Ma is sitting on the floor, almost in tears. She doesn't know how to cope with the death of her child. She'd get up to call Dad and tell him the news, but he wouldn't understand her through the sobbing. Tears roll down her face, which looks older from the years of drugs. Her hair, brown and grey, is frizzed out from running her fingers through her hair so many times in sadness. Far from the hippy dreadlocks they used to be. She picks up the phone. Punches in the numbers. Waits for someone to pick up.


Dad hears the news, and rushes home, his wrinkled face holding back tears, his beard soaking up the ones that fall. He tries to comfort ma, but it doesn't work. She's still frantic. Dad calls in the rest of the family. They drop what they're doing and come as quickly as they can. Marcus(rain), Jesse (cosmo), Alice (fern), Alan (ziggy), Mira (daydream), Chris (moonlight), and Abby (marigold) gather around to hear the news, and comfort our mother. Dad calls my apartment, Chris talks to my co-workers, and Marcus talks to the police. Nothing is found.

The police search for days. They bring in countless people, search everywhere I could have been, and even look in the bay. They don't find me. My parents get by on the assumption that I was kidnapped, and I'll show up soon. The siblings start to think I'm already dead, but nobody knows for sure. Mom and Dad try to calm down with the old standby: drugs. The rest of the family mourn. Samuel drinks away his pain.

Another week, and I'll be pronounced dead. They'll hold a funeral ceremony with an empty casket. My stuff will be divided among the family. My apartment will be put up for rent, and someone else will ponder about putting up a famous P.I.'s name on the door. Someone else will take a position selling photocopiers to people who don't need them. Someone else will start drinking at The King's Head. Someone else will start playing SOCOM online. Someone else will have to learn Sam's code.

Isn't it strange how easily I can be replaced.